It’s important to know when to bend and when to stand your ground. Not every situation you find yourself in a relationship is as simple as it sounds. Sometimes it’s more like: we believe different things about this, so we either have to agree to disagree, or meet somewhere in the middle. Relationships are a lot about the grey area, so you have to tread extra carefully to make sure you don’t completely lose yourself in all the compromising. There are certain things you should never let go, no matter how much someone else might want you to.
Here are 8 things you should never compromise in your relationship.
Your career goals: We all have things we want for our careers. When you’re in a relationship, you have to support one another in these goals. Sometimes you might have to compromise your life to work with your partner’s career, and sometimes they will have to do the same for you. But neither of you should have to give up your career goals to make your relationship work. Instead, your relationship should work around what you both want professionally.
The way you feel about yourself: If someone goes to pains to make you feel bad about yourself, they’re not the right person for you. Meanwhile, if you feel the way you feel about yourself changing implicitly when you’re with someone, you need to address that too, even if it is your own doing. The person you’re with should make you feel more like, not less, and if you’re down on yourself because of your relationship then that’s a compromise you should not be making.
Lifestyle: Let’s say you’ve always wanted at least two kids and life in the suburbs, but your partner doesn’t want kids and prefers to live in the city. The life you want might seem suffocating to your partner, and you can’t compromise on that without one of you being miserable. The best thing to do is stop prolonging the inevitable and end the relationship. There’s no use wasting anyone’s time if your life vision doesn’t align.
Family and friends: Be wary of any partner who tries to keep you from seeing your family and friends. It’s normal to see less of them because now you’re spending more time with your partner, and while some possessiveness may make you feel wanted and special in the beginning, it can also be a red flag of things to come later in the relationship.
Financial Security: These days, having your finances in check is important if you plan on buying a house, taking out loans, or dream of retiring early. And, your partner’s bad credit or spending habits can eventually impact you. If financially they are taking from you and not contributing to expenses, there is nothing to compromise here. They must stop. If it feels like you’re constantly footing the bill and mooching off of you, it’s best to keep your accounts and finances separate and plan very inexpensive dates until they get their finances together.
The type of relationship you want: It should never be okay for your partner to pressure you into doing things you don’t want to do. For example: Having an open relationship, a or anything else that makes you uncomfortable in your relationship. Inviting another person into your relationship is a big decision that can create jealousy when you want to be strengthening your intimate bond.
The treatment you’re willing to tolerate: Likewise, you should compromise on the way you expect to be treated by your partner. You should always be treated with respect, and if you’re consistently treated with anything less than, then that’s not something you have to tolerate. Being in love doesn’t mean you need to compromise on your self-esteem to continue that love. Love should never require you to sacrifice being treated with care.
Your dreams: You’re entitled to your dreams for the future. Dreams don’t always come true, but it’s your right to chase them. If your partner doesn’t want you to follow your dreams, then you might be with the wrong person
The bottom line? A romantic partner should be a partner and not a babysitter, parent, or a therapist. It’s good to have a partner we can share our frustration with or ask for help and lean on, but it shouldn’t be the main focus of a romantic relationship to be solving one person’s problems and dumping negativities and frustrations on each other.