It is clear that parents these days spend more time with their children and are more connected with their lives. Remember yourself when you were a child – did your parents know about everything you did or everything you liked? Probably not. They didn’t have much time for that, but also, the relationships with children were a bit different.
Today, we see plenty of parents being involved in the lives of their children a little bit too much. Have you ever wondered why such parents create children who are frightened, have low self-esteem, and often cannot do anything on their own?
Every single child needs their own space in life. They have to create their own way of thinking, they need to act completely with their individuality at some point, and they must not be monitored by their parents all the time.
It is simply possible because children in such families get their own chance to do things and grow.
And how do we learn? We learn by exploring the world. We learn by making mistakes. We learn by thinking with our own brains.
Besides that, countless parents nowadays don’t let their children grow up. They simply don’t allow it! Although they are probably not completely aware of their actions, their children suffer the consequences of such behavior.
I still see too many mothers and fathers preparing breakfast for their child even if they already have 12 years old. And what about making their bed? ”Don’t do it, sweety, mommy will do it!” Does that sound familiar? Well, it is wrong!
Working on their own individuality and taking responsible actions and completing tasks in life is what makes children more intelligent and independent. They have to learn to live on their own. Parents must stop being afraid that their children will not be able to survive without their help.
The main point of a good upbringing would definitely be allowing your child to be an individual. He or she must also build self-esteem, and they cannot do it when you constantly try to be involved in everything.
So, lazy parents that don’t do everything for their children, but also lead their own lives besides just constantly worrying if their child will be able to ”prepare pancakes” for breakfast, are not only happier but have children who are capable of creating and living a better and more fulfilled life.
When young adults are often anxious, the main problem usually lays in the family. Parents who were overprotective don’t raise mentally healthy children. And when they are not mentally happy, they will miss so many opportunities in life just because of fear.
So please, try to understand that doing more doesn’t mean doing better for your child. Let them be a person for themselves. Yes, you are a family, and you should always support them, give advice, or help when really needed, but never do everything instead of them. Trust me, they don’t like that either.
I am a pedagogue and I hope this was useful for you, dear reader.
Have you realized that parenting has changed a lot in these modern times?
What are the biggest mistakes parents make?