Texting and sending messages are a huge part of dating today. You have to know how to get it right so that you aren’t coming on too strong or being too playful and ultimately not being taken seriously. Texting can be a tricky thing! Even though it’s so common now.
You shouldn’t get yourself into a scenario called the texting trap. If you’re online dating, you wouldn’t want to fall into the texting trap.
What is the texting trap?
The text trap is basically we meet someone online and then we chat. We say good morning and also goodnight. Even if he’s the one doing it, you’re still responding or you feel obligated to respond. You don’t want to do this because when you fall into a texting trap with a man you hardly know, you’re literally reducing the chances of him asking you out.
Follow these 5 simple tips to make sure that your text messages don’t cause you problems before you and your met get started.
Texting is for information, not a conversation: This is where many people get tripped up. You don’t need to have a whole conversation about your life over text. It’s not actually building a rapport with him. Your whole job is to get to the first date and then get to the second date and make them see you in person. You don’t want to say everything over text. We tend to have fewer inhibitions on text than we do in person. So, the person on text may build a persona that is not exactly like the person you’ll meet in real life.
Don’t get too cute: You think you’re being cute and using emojis and too many abbreviations like LOL and all of the others that aren’t actual words. You may cause your date to actually think that you’re immature. Control the tone of your text. You don’t want to ruin the date before you actually get to it. So, just keep it really simple and control the tone in those first texts.
Text as your authentic self: Something we’ve noticed people lately is creating online alter egos. They text differently than they’d talk in real life. hey often use different words, act much more playful and avoid expressing their real opinions or wants for fear of not coming across as laid back and fun. There are two major issues with this practice. The first is that, when you do meet up offline, your authentic personality isn’t going to match up to the alternate persona you’ve been using in your text messages.
The second is that you’re not showcasing your true, genuine self. So, the person you’re meeting up with might end up feeling tricked or, worse, you might feel as though you have to continue the charade or even have anxiety about meeting offline because you realize you haven’t been yourself. Sacrificing who you really are and what you really want is no way to kick off a new relationship.
Avoid being ‘too available’: If you grab your phone and reply the moment you see a new text notification pop-up on your screen, we would argue you’re making yourself a bit too available. The person on the other end (who you haven’t even met offline outside of your initial meeting I remind you!) is going to start expecting an immediate response from you every single time, which not only side-tracks your life but I often see it lead to misunderstanding and/or resentment. The problem with coming across as overly available is that the other person may begin to expect constant availability, accommodation, and acceptance.