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Red Flags on the First Date that Signal your Relationship isn’t going anywhere

Any new relationship is full of challenges. You’re getting to know someone, and there’s no telling when something might happen to burst the bubble of your new romance. In general, it’s fun learning all there is to know about someone who used to be a stranger. However, sometimes, there will be signs that you shouldn’t take things ahead. Every person has their quirks and opinions, and someone who’s a bit different isn’t a reason to run for the hills. However, it’s a major red flag if you find yourself compromising on yourself or feeling uncomfortable.

So here are eight subtle signals which show that the person you’re out with is not the one for you.

If it suddenly feels like you’re on a date with someone entirely new: If you ever find yourself on a second date wondering who this new person is in front of you in the middle of the date night, then it’s time to rethink. Either that first person you met was an act, or this person is. In any way, a lack of authenticity is a big red flag of some major underlying issues.

At the end of the date, you know absolutely everything about them or nothing: When the date night ends, you realize you’ve made it through two outings and either you know next to nothing about who they are, or you know they were too busy talking about them to learn a single thing about you. If you feel like you see a lot more about what they like and who they are than they know about you after the first date, it may be an uphill battle to get a reciprocal balance in the mutual caring arena later on.

If they get too dangerous, too quickly: So there you are planning to wrap up the date, and they are already talking love, marriage, and commitment. It is a sign that it’s time to call it a night. Either this person is clingy, or they think that’s what you want to hear and are attempting to manipulate you. You both need to hold it until you’re both sure.

If they start getting pushy: If by the end of the date, they have gone full octopus and are not respecting your boundaries, that’s a signal that there should not be further contact. It’s one of the significant red signs if anyone starts pushing you more than you’re comfort level on a very first date. It’s a red flag if your new partner doesn’t respect any physical limits you set about physical or intimacy.

If you both have nothing in common except attraction: You guys have no common interests, life goals, or morals but he/she is just so cute. The chemistry between two people is fundamental. If you are looking for something serious and if you realize there is nothing there except attraction then it’s time to call it off.

If the attention is missing: If you don’t catch his/her attention on the first date, the chances are that they’ve made their priorities clear. For example, if he takes you to his favorite sports bar, and spend more time with his eyes on the game on the screen than on you. If you are as engrossed in the game as he is, this might be a good thing.

If they start elaborating past relationship too quickly: Usually people tell you what they want you to know about them. If they spend the first date developing on how much they hate their family or ex-partner or job or how other friends in the past have wronged them, it’s time to rethink. If they’ve already started sharing how poorly they’ve managed the different relationship in their life, call the date off before you end up being the next person on their list of “failed relationship.”

asdfaIf they’ve been more focused on mobile: If he/she can’t manage to stay focused on you and the conversation or the food or the film or the music longer than a couple of minutes before checking their phone, bingo! It’s a red signal. Their ability to focus on the potential relationship that the two of you are trying to establish on the first date can be a good indication of their future willingness to be emotionally present in the future. Some of these signals will make their presence known right away. However, some of them might take a second date for you to be 100% sure.

The key is to trust your inner voice. Don’t always excuse away the things you don’t like to be fair. Instead, focus on being honest with yourself by not settling for less than what you deserve.

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