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Flirting with someone when you’re in a relationship… How Far Can You Go?

Who doesn’t like attention? Everyone loves a little bit of flirtatious play from the opposite gender including those who are madly in love and committed to someone. It is entirely natural and reasonable thing to desire. Little bit attention from special one makes us feel confident and desirable. However, those of us who are in a relationship aren’t always sure about precisely what harmless flirting is?

Okay, so first thing comes first. Harmless flirting is not a myth. It does exist. Not every glance or compliment is towards you. Attraction and love can exist without each other, and flirting occurs when someone is attracted. Nowadays people use dating platforms for flirting (have you tried http://beautifulpeopledate.com/ platform yet?) Let’s be honest: Flirting is fun. It’s a universal truth for anyone over the age of…well, whatever age it is you began to flirt. It makes your heart beat a little faster and change your mood in a second.

According to the dictionary:

Flirt: to act amorously without serious intentions; play at love; coquet.

Doesn’t that sound like fun? However, is it okay to flirt when you’re dating someone? How far can you go? As long as you don’t cross the limits while flirting, there’s nothing wrong with it. A physical or emotional attachment can damage a relationship. A secure attachment to a person can also ruin your relationship. If you are flirting merely for thrills and a quick ego boost, then you’re not pushing it. However, it’s not always that simple.

Sometimes, things can get confusing, or we can get carried away. We might start believing that the flirting we are doing is harmless and healthy. If your relationship is suffering in any way because of this flirting thing, you might need to take a step back. If you would rather “harmlessly” flirt with someone else than spend time with your partner, and then you might be sliding down a slippery slope. If your physical relationship with your partner seems to be slowing down while you are busy seeking harmless flirting, then it’s gone beyond just flirting. It’s no more harmless flirting in any way.

As long as it’s not a distraction from what you have with the one you love, it’s all okay. However, if it takes away something like time, emotions or anything even in the smallest amount from your relationship, you might not be able to stop in time. It’s good to flirt, but it’s important to be aware of how your relationship is holding up. When you are in a serious relationship and start flirting with someone new, it’s between three people, and you need to look out for the third person just as much as you need to look out for yourself and your partner. If you have no serious intentions of taking things forward with them, then don’t lead them on. Make sure you balance out the flirting with explicit messages that you have no plans to compromise your relationship.

Why people flirt when they are in a relationship? People who are in relationship flirt for many reasons like attention, distraction, validation, time pass, or just every day and straightforward fun. By nature, when our partner wants something from someone else, it’s pretty easy to internalize that – why didn’t they what that from me? Flirting is dangerous when you’re a part of a serious relationship because it breeds insecurity in your partner. They’re not sure why you’re talking to someone else and not them. It becomes a typical cycle, in which they’re not sure what you’re doing, and you’re not sure what they’re doing, and everyone’s just confused all over the place. It’s all good as long as it is not affecting your relationship in any way.

Why would people want to curb our intentions to flirt? Because it’s a thoughtful thing to do. Well, that doesn’t mean you should talk to new people around your partner. No, be friendly. It’s tough to define a line between friendly and flirty because it’s tiny and thin. However, you’ll know when you’re getting close and need to back off. It always feels like you’re about to cross a line – like you’re about to do something that could potentially hurt someone you love.

So be thoughtful. Think about what you’re doing and how it will impact your relationship. Make sure that you and your partner are on the same page when it comes to figuring out what’s okay and what not.

Do you guys believe in healthy flirting?

How far can you guys go flirting while being in a relationship?

Kindly share with us in the comment box!

Categories: Relationship
Rachana Mesvaniya:
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