As a social species, we, humans seek validation from others. It is their opinions and criticisms that shape our understanding or acceptance of ourselves. This may not hold true for each and every individual, but according to Abraham Maslow, an American psychologist, love and a sense of belonging are vital needs. Even the most introverted or anti-social person is impacted by those around them. Hence, it can be downright gut wrenching to deal with discouragement. They trample all over one’s already-hesitant perspective and work adversely by lowering their self esteem. Next time you face discouragement, here are a few pointers to keep in mind:
Your opinion of yourself is the main factor that could lead to your success. With every test in life, if you believe in yourself, there’s nothing that can stop you from acing it. However, if you are persuaded by others’ disregard of your abilities, chances are that you may not succeed. Place your self-growth at the top of the list, and focus on that, instead of somebody’s harsh words. As long as your self esteem and confidence are high, you shouldn’t have to worry about what anyone else says.
It’s not about proving yourself to others, but becoming a better version of you. Sometimes, you may feel the need to prove others wrong with regards to their lack of faith in you. But if you were to do that, then all of your efforts would be focused on another person. Although, that could work as a decent motivator, don’t do it. I can guarantee that treating yourself well gives you an immense amount of internal strength that nobody can steal from you. When somebody says that you can’t do something, do it only if your heart’s in it and not to show off to them.
People will always have something bad to say, doesn’t mean you should listen. There are billions of people in this world. There’s nothing you can do about their negative opinions. So let them speak to walls and don’t give them the satisfaction of having impacted you. It can be extremely infuriating to come across people with a skewed perception or world view, but think of it rationally. How many minds can you change? How many people can you defend before bullies realize what they’re doing is wrong? It’s all about not letting them affect you. Throw that Invisibility Cloak on them and stride past, with your head held high.
A study published in the Journal of Educational Psychology explores the difference in impact of encouragement and discouragement on performance. It showed that of all the participants, those who were comparatively poor had a tendency of being adversely impacted by discouragement. Don’t allow your ethnicity, religion or any other aspect of your personality to be the reason for getting discouraged. You have nothing to be ashamed of, and you shouldn’t allow anyone else to make you think otherwise.