Americans are hitting major milestones by time like moving in together, buying homes, having kids without even tying the knot, but still the institution of marriage plays a pretty good role in life of Americans. The United States has been facing many social changes over the past half-century and one of them is the decline of the institution of marriage, a decline especially among black people.
In 1960, roughly 74% of white ware married, and the rate dropped to 56% in 2008. That is a quite big drop but not compared to the plummeting marriage rate for black people. In 1960, 61% blacks ware married, but by 2008 it was only 32%. Blacks also get divorced more often and remarry less frequently than whites.
Why black people and especially black women are finding it’s hard to get married? Are they expecting too much? Is there a shortage of black man?
Let’s get an answer to all the questions here. Let’s start with the 32 years old black stunning beauty Nicole Marchand. She is more than just a beauty with kind nature. She is already a prosecuting attorney in Atlanta and running for state court judge. You would find her at the Georgia Dome, cheering on the Atlanta Falcons pro football team. She appears to have all qualities to be man’s woman. And yet, she is still single. She is not one example, there are plenty of other women are there.
Apparently, 42% of black women have never been married, double the number of white women who’ve never get married. Let’s go through some points which help to understand the facts of why black women are finding it hard to get married.
Putting career first
There are a lot of reasons to explain why black women are not getting married and one of them is priority of career. Many black women put their career first, and relationships ware put on the backburner. Once they became financially successful buying their own cars, home and living a nice lifestyle on their own, there wasn’t an economic incentive to find a man to take care of them.
Most of the black women preferred to date black men. It wasn’t that they opposed to dating men of a different race, but there was often guilt associated with dating men who weren’t black. Of course they concerns about being accepted by friends, family, and members of the community.
When they look around college campuses, and they wouldn’t see men who look like them because black women are graduating from college at twice the rate of black men. If we look through comparison of man and women than there are 1.8 million more black women than black men. So even if every black man in America married black women, one out of 12 black women still be single if they hoped to marry a black guy.
Let’s take 100 black men. By the time you eliminate those without a high school diploma, the unemployed and those ages, 25 to 34 who are incarcerated, you have only half of black men. Yes, just 54%, whom many black women find acceptable.
There are a lot of women, though, who are trying to match up their education level, who are trying to match up their corporate status to find somebody on the same pitch, and they are having trouble. That has nothing to do with manhood at all. When the subject came about their requirements, we asked group of girls and here is their answers.
The general agreement in this group of ladies was that their preference is to marry a black man. And it’s not that they can’t one to date. The issue is mostly case is exclusive. Waters said, “I had a list of 50 things that I would keep in my Bible. It is now down to about 10. Most importantly she wants a financially stable guy”
Ashford said, “Honesty”
Watson said, “Supportive”
Marchand said, “Certain age of her and of course attractive”
Watson kind of breaks a deal here and said, “Just because of my past – men with kids or just not being ambitious.”
Ashford said, “I want initial chemistry. I don’t care if you have everything on the list.”
Are the highly educated, financially successful black women willing to date black men without the same level of education or success? In the group of beautiful ladies, we also had a man who shared his views.
According to Harvey “The selection of men is slim. There are still a lot of good men out there who are being overlooked. Black women don’t have to settle but they may need to compromise. You are a corporate exec, does he have to be a corporate exec? You make $150,000. Has he to make $150,000 or above? If your requirement sheet is ridiculous, then you have to look at it.”
Passing through a long time being single
Everyone should be single at one point. It’s a great way to find yourself and discover what’s important to you. At the same time, the women who take themselves off the market the ones in their 30s who feel that marriage and a family just isn’t going to happen for them forget what it feels like to be in a relationship and compromise. They forget that relationships require work, because they’re so used to doing everything in their lives alone. So when they meet someone who might be potentially be a great partner, the relationship has to be potential to fail just because they’ve forgotten the skills necessary to make a relationship work.
There’s some kind of deal with black girls. A lot of white girls are getting married by 25 with kids by 27 compare to black girls. Melinda Watson is a beautiful 28-year-old payroll specialist who hasn’t had an exclusive relationship since college.
She said, “We are maybe not as coveted as black men in society. I just feel there is a lot of taboo that is associated with dating black women because I don’t think they are necessarily ready to take us home to see momma.”
Ashford said “My parents are very comfortable. I’ve dated unemployed men, men trying to find themselves, struggling artist and rich men, poor men.” She doesn’t mind to look for a man outside her race. Indeed, the number of black women entering interracial marriages has more than doubled in the past decade.
She shared one of her recent experience “Last night, I was at a restaurant and had a great conversation with a Caucasian man. We ware vibing, we ware clicking and I am thinking at the end of the night he’s going to ask for my numbers, because white men never ask for my number, and he just said ‘Great conversation, maybe I will see you around.’ And there I was like what happened?”
The tick-tock of biological clock
There are curtain age for everything according to our body and biological clock. For example, its best time to get married around 25 and around 30s its best for building family. The tick-tock of the biological clock is a bit louder for many women, including black women. After 30s they find it more difficult to go with their expectations.
While these women look for settling down, they prefer to not willing to settle. If they don’t find a perfect match, they would prefer to stay single.
Now it’s not tough to understand why the marriage ration for black people is falling down by each passing year.